This is the penultimate wedding joke before next weeks nuptials. Though I'm thinking now will I have time Friday morning to post one more joke? Enjoy!

Concerned about her relationship, a woman approaches her doctor and says, "Doc, I'm getting married this weekend and my fiance thinks I'm a virgin & I'm not! Is there anything you can do to help me?"

The doctor says, "Medically, no, but here's something you can try. On the wedding night, when you're getting ready for bed, take an elastic band and slide it to your upper thigh. When your husband puts it in, snap the elastic band and tell him it's your virginity snapping."

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In know its late in the day, but i've had a busy one. Anyway, thanks to Charlie Griefer for sending this wedding joke over. If anyone else has got one I'm gonna need it over soon. In the mean time I've got a stag night tonight with friends and family then come tomorrow we're on the 7 day countdown :) Enjoy! (NSFW'ish)

A groom passes down the aisle of the church to take his place by the altar and the best man notices that the groom has the biggest, brightest smile on his face. The best man says, "Hey man, I know you're happy to be getting married, but what's up - you look so excited."

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I've modified my BlogCFC code a little today. Instead of having the usual Digg/Delicious bookmark links I've swapped them for a Add This button which is apparently the #1 bookmarking and sharing button on the Internet.

You need to sign up for a free account but this is only to allow tracking and stats that you view.

When you create your button there is no need to really change the code as its picks up the page URL. But if you want to specify an alternate URL because you want to have the button multiple times on one page then you need to use the addthis_url and addthis_title variables (e.g. addthis_url='http://www.andyjarrett.com/andy/blog/alternate-page.html';).

Below is the code I'm using for BlogCFC. All I've done is removed the Digg and Delicious links in the index.cfm template and replaced it with with the following:

Another Firday has come, which means another week closer to the wedding for me. I have yet to see a good wedding joke to stick up on the Friday. If you have one send it in. Enjoy!

A father watched his young daughter playing in the garden.

He smiled as he reflected on how sweet and pure his little girl was.

Tears formed in his eyes as he thought about her seeing the wonders of nature through such innocent eyes.

Suddenly she just stopped and stared at the ground.

He went over to her to see what work of God had captured her attention.

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Well its four weeks tomorrow till the wedding and I gotta say its pretty hectic around here. I know my normal techy related posts have been far and few between but hopefully that will pick up again in the new year. Enjoy!

Four men get together at a reunion. Three of them had sons and they started bragging about them, while the fourth guy went to the bar to get some drinks.

The first man said his son was doing so well he now owned a factory manufacturing furniture. Why, just the other day he gave his best friend a whole house full of brand new furniture.

The second man said his son was doing just as well. he was a manager at a car sales firm. Why, just the other day he gave his best friend a Ferrari.

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Codeweavers gave President Bush a challenge to meet at least one of several goals before he left office. One of these goals was to lower gas prices in the Twin Cities below $2.79 a gallon. Since this has now happened (though I doubt Bush had anything really to do with it, it was more Opex) they are offering their software for free, today (28th October).

At the time of writing this though Slashdot and Digg seems to of brought codeweavers.com, but thats not stopping them. You can still register your email address for a free serial and fully unlocked builds of CrossOver Mac Pro, CrossOver Games Mac, CrossOver Linux Pro, and CrossOver Games Linux are available as well.

Found via (Slashdot)

With something like over 150 jokes now blogged here there is going to be duplicates. Luckily at 5:30am some people are more awake/alert than me, namely Big Mad Kev (of Scotch on the Rocks) who pointed out my earlier joke was a duplicate of this one.

Always ready though, I had received a joke from Martin Jones (no url). Don't forget if you get have a funny joke, send it on over via my contace me page. So if it hasn't appeared already, Enjoy!

A man and his wife were awakened at 3:00 am by a loud pounding on the door. The man gets up and goes to the door where a drunken stranger, standing in the pouring rain, is asking for a push.

'Not a chance,' says the husband, 'it is 3:00 in the morning!' He slams the door and returns to bed.

'Who was that?' asked his wife.

'Just some drunk guy asking for a push,' he answers.

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After a (too) long break the UKCfug is back with a sweet new design, new content and a new meet date.

The next meet-up is at the Design UK office (10 Warwick Street, London, W1B 5LZ) on November the 6th at 7pm. The topic will be "Structuring your development team and getting the work done " preseneted by Neil Middleton(of Feed Squirrel). You can find out more info at the UKCFUG site.

Little Timmy was in the garden filling in a hole when his neighbour peered over the fence. Interested in what the cheeky-faced youngster was up to, he politely asked,

"What are you up to there, Tim?"

"My goldfish died," replied Tim tearfully, without looking up, "and I've just buried him."

The neighbour was concerned, "That's an awfully big hole for a goldfish, isn't it?"

Timmy patted down the last heap of earth then replied,

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Well after a weeks break the Friday Joke is back!

The doctor said, "Joe, the good news is I can cure your headaches. The bad news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare condition, which causes your testicles to press on your spine, and the pressure creates one hell of a headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove the testicles."

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